I was in a much different place last year. I cannot tell you why. I just know I was not well. I did my usual routine of keeping to myself and not asking for help. What's that saying, 'insanity is doing the same thing in the same way & expecting a different outcome (or result).' How could I expect to get better when I wasn't willing to change.
As mentioned in a previous post, I did things a little different this summer. I went completely out of my comfort zone, in one case. I wouldn't say I had a life altering experience, but am I glad I did it. Yes. I am.
Maybe I have a better perspective on life. I certainly hope so. There are (so) many things I cannot control and the headaches caused by worry are just not worth it. For instance, despite trying to get adequate rest, eating better, taking vitamins, etc, I am still quite tired most days. I'm trying to not let that get me down and realize this is my reality. It has been for decades.
I can take the blah days. They will not get me down.
Today: Like most, I'm trying to figure things out. Sometimes that's day by day, moment by moment, and even breath by breath.