my anxious life
  • Home
  • Blog
  • Writing Projects
  • Coaching (Athletics)
  • Book Club
  • About Me

KNOW THIS. YOU MATTER . MND XO

Best. Birthday. Ever.

6/12/2016

0 Comments

 
Coming to grips with the reality of single-hood (which lets be honest has always been a reality) is harder than I imaged it would be. I've never spent more than a few months with someone in my life. I've never lost the 'love of my life'. Yet my heart sinks deeper and deeper. The wall that I've tried so hard to breakdown, finds a way to rebuild itself. It turns out bricks and mortar are harder to destroy than originally thought.

But on my birthday, my heart is full.

​About a month ago, I decided to take a trip to Toronto to see the Blue Jays play. I've only ever watched one live baseball game, New York Mets vs. Seattle Mariners. It was in Seattle on another solo trip - where I was much more anonymous.

I planned to buy a ticket in a random section away from too much action as I wanted to be inconspicuous. Moses, a friend from childhood, who now works for the Blue Jays had a different idea for where I would sit. He got me a ticket close to the action.

Today was full of surprises.

He went above and beyond and got me a sneak peak at batting practice, and gave me a private tour of the clubhouse after the game! I'll admit it, I became the biggest fangirl when I met one of the players (Jose Bautista)!

I am beyond grateful.

At first I wasn't so sure about this (trip). But the more I thought about it the more I realized I cannot stop living because I am single. I cannot stop living because I do not have a companion. I cannot stop living.

"... most of you are making your decisions not upon what can happen in your future. Most of you are making all of your decisions upon what has happened to you in your past. If you had a breakup of a relationship that was a very hurtful breakup, and that emotional history is stored inside of you ...

... You perceive, you associate, "Have I seen anything like this before?" Yes. Your stored emotional history is then evoked, and you decide. "What is thIs probably leading me to?" You say, "More pain," and you decide not to get involved with the new person because of the old person." - Lou Tice, TPI
0 Comments

Your comment will be posted after it is approved.


Leave a Reply.

    Author

    I am a daughter, sister, auntie, wife and friend.

    ​Like most, I'm trying to figure things out. Sometimes that's day by day, moment by moment, and even breath by breath.

    Categories

    All
    Anxiety
    Awareness
    Body Image
    Depression
    Family
    Friends
    Love
    Meditation
    Mental Health
    Mindfulness
    Reflection
    Travel
    Vulnerability

    Archives

    June 2024
    April 2023
    December 2021
    August 2021
    March 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    March 2020
    September 2019
    June 2019
    April 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    May 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    September 2014
    July 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    September 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    June 2013
    April 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013

    More Archives

    RSS Feed

Proudly powered by Weebly
  • Home
  • Blog
  • Writing Projects
  • Coaching (Athletics)
  • Book Club
  • About Me